Mrs. Julien’s #CBR5 Review #37: The Warlord Wants Forever by Kresley Cole

If you whisper the title, it sounds even better.

warlordJust when I thought my preferred reading material couldn’t possibly be more silly, my brain pointed out, “You’ve never really given paranormal romance a shot”. Kresley Cole is a very big name in the genre. She has a huge following. She has dozens of books. She has copious high ratings on Amazon. I have a Kindle. I have 99 cents. The Warlord Wants Forever was worth each and every one of them because Nikolai Wroth is a vampire and Myst the Coveted is, I am not making this up, a Valkyrie. They meet cute.

A prequel to Cole’s Immortals After Dark series, The Warlord Wants Forever is set in an unseen world populated by illusory creatures familiar from mythology and Things That Go Bump in the Night. There may also be shape-shifters. I’m not sure. Until last night, my main romance concern was historically-accurate frocks and then suddenly it was all fangs, blood, and violently intense love scenes that I’ve decided to christen “THUNDER SEX™”. There is some sort of internecine war between the Myth/Bump factions and Nikolai the hot vampire warlord gets “blooded” (imprinted) by the tempestuous Valkyrie, Myst the Coveted. It’s a mating system requiring, to put it delicately, initial release exclusivity, so when Myst escapes Nikolai before the THUNDER SEX™ consummation devoutly to be wished, he must chase his Valkyrie down to relieve his eternal blue balls. It takes him five years. Then he has to convince her to shack up with him, a lesser immortal being. There is a magical waist chain involved.

The novella was fun and the first time I’ve heard of a story that did involve a Valkyrie and didn’t involve Richard Wagner. The THUNDER SEX™ was hot and plentiful, if a trifle “red in tooth and claw” for my tastes. There is clearly a huge audience for paranormal romance and I could go on about what tastes or appetites this kind of fiction appeals to, but I think it all comes down, almost literally because of the vampires, to à chacun son goût.  If I ever have qualms about the nature of The (Shameful) Tally’s contents, I now know it could be worse, if not quite so deliciously ridiculous.

After reading The Warlord Wants Forever,  I tried another work from Cole’s Immortals After Dark series, Lothaire, about an ancient vampire finding love with a blue-collar mortal (which is apparently totally declassé and galling). It was even redder in tooth and claw than The Warlord Wants Forever  and included a THUNDER SEX™ scene which can be imagined as biting a sausage longways for a protracted period of time. Sex? Sure. Blood. Useful. Sex and blood? I’m out thus ended my paranormal romance experiment.

… or I was until being given more Kresley Cole books by Malin and Alexis. I’M NOT MADE OF STONE! As a result, I have reviewed the following linked books from the series as well A Hunger Like No Other; No Rest for the Wicked; Wicked Deeds on a Winter’s Night; Dark Deeds at Night’s Edge; Dark Desires After Dusk; Kiss of a Demon King; Deep Kiss of Winter; Pleasure of a Dark Prince; Demon from the Dark; Dreams of a Dark Warrior; Lothaire; MacRieve; Shadow’s Claim.

This review is also posted on my tiny little blog.

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9 thoughts on “Mrs. Julien’s #CBR5 Review #37: The Warlord Wants Forever by Kresley Cole

  1. Well if you don’t like Cole’s THUNDER SEX (I’m totally stealing that BTW) my experience with paranormal romance is that it’s all downhill from here. I’ve tried a number of bestselling authors (Frost, Ward, Moning, Briggs, Kenyon) and despite my love of romance and fantasy novels, they were quickly tossed in my recycle pile and forgotten. Nalini Singh is an ever popular writer in this genre and Slave to Sensation was so horrible I still don’t understand how anybody finishes it. Also the cover art looks too much like a topless man standing in a noxious fart cloud. In fact I’m pretty sure this is why he’s standing alone.

    http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/178476.Slave_to_Sensation

    Still I’ll admit a certain fondness for the cheese, banter, and THUNDER SEX of Kresley Cole. If you’re ever at an airport bookstore looking for something to entertain on a long flight, give some of the earlier books a try: No Rest for the Wicked or Wicked Deeds on a Winter Night.

    • I can’t with Kenyon. Her popularity is inexplicable to me. Moning… I started with (and loved) Fever, which is more UF than PNR, and I think because of the tie-ins between that and some of the Highlander books I was able to enjoy those a bit more. All together, I think I prefer the PNR that is NOT about a plucky human/regular girl and her supernatural beau, which is what Kenyon et. al. mostly do.

  2. I get the feeling that Cole is getting more extreme with every book. There’s tons of fun ones in between The Warlord Wants Forever and Lothaire (which is her latest release). One of my favourites is No Rest for the Wicked which features Sebastian (which as we both know is an awesome hero name), Nikolai’s brother and Kaderin the Cold Hearted, another Valkyrie. Also an insane scavenger hunt around the world. If you do want to give it a try, send me an e-mail. I’ll happily send you a copy. 🙂

    • Gosh, both you and Alexis recommend it so I’d love to give it a go. I want so badly to return the favour though. Can I get you the new Long coming out soon, or the new Milan as a thank you, or BOTH?

      I thought Lothaire looked Sebastian-y on the cover and that was the reason I tried it (plus the library had it to hand).

      • You really don’t need to feel guilty about me sending you books. I love sharing books with my friends, that way they can also read them, and I have someone to discuss them with. But if you really want to send me the next Long or Milan, to feel better of course you can. I’m so glad the next Milan has a release date – to say that I’m excited is a massive understatement!

      • Thanks for your kind offer but I’m the last person on the planet without an ereader so 😛

        Also I often visit your shameful tally which is a great resource so thank YOU!

  3. Haha! So thrilled you dove into PNR, which is kind of my romance corner of choice. Admittedly so many of them are so, so horrible, but I can’t help myself? Of all that I’ve read so far (an amount which still pales in comparison to your tour de historical romance) I really have enjoyed the Demonica series by Larissa Ione. You’ll definitely want to e-reader these though because the titles and covers are… gratuitous.

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